glitter

ok.
i know it's been almost a month since this happened.
but, everytime i see it,
i get chills.
so beautiful and artistic.
and, yes, a little strange with the water.
but, i love how effortless she makes it look.

favorite lyrics..
have you ever wished for an endless night?
have you ever held your breath
and asked yourself
will it ever get better than tonight?

Pink - Glitter In The Air (Live @ 52nd Annual Grammy Awards)- Watch more Music Videos at Vodpod.

listen

laying in bed this morning
today felt like one of those days
ya know.
the ones where you want to just
roll over
and go back
to sleep.

morning came too quickly.
paul left too early.
the kids are a little too eager.
laundry is a little too much.
my house is a little too messy.

everything is just a little
too
much.

thankfully
while saying my prayers.
praying for a little
pick
me
up
i had a bright idea.

i turned this song on.
and hit repeat.
and raised the volume
till the beat sounded in the walls
and the floor.

and i took a deep breath
and felt life
seep back in.

currently

i am in love with adele.

i absolutely cannot stop listening to her album.

tired is my favorite right now.

love/hate

and now
for an epic blog post about our 2 1/2 week vacation..
in terms of love and hate

consider yourself warned..it is LONG.
{and kinda reads like a children's book. sorry.}

i love
this picture i took on the drive to utah


i love
my breast pump.

i didn't love
the fact that a certain 3 year old
was insistent on stopping every 45 minutes or else he would pee his pants.

i love
that we thought to put a pull-up on him after the fourth stop in two hours.

i love
what it says on the back of this truck



i love
clouds. and miss them.
what we have in seattle is called cloud COVER.
so these are so exciting to me.


and these


i did not love
that we left seattle at 1pm and arrived in west jordan at 3:30am.
or 4:30am with the time change.

i love
paul's fabulous sis for leaving the door open for us,
having cozy beds made up for a us, fresh towels
and breakfast out when we woke up the next morning.

i love
the resort we stayed at for my family reunion
and highly recommend it.
bathrooms, showers, pool, rec room, playground...
my kind of camping.

i love
my family


i love
max's face in this picture


i loved
watching taylor rock out to guitar hero metallica.

i did not love
that it was hovering around a brutal 100 degrees every single day.

i loved
listening to my grandpa play his guitar and sing.

i did not love
forgetting a load of laundry in the resort laundry room.
and remembering it when we were two hours away.

and calling the resort and getting a rude lady on the phone
who actually said, "well, duh" when i told her what i did.
and then crying in humiliation after hanging up with her
{not a good moment for me}

but
i did love
my hero emily calling the resort in huff and
demanding they mail
my laundry to me.

they did. overnight.
and i'm a wimp.

i love
this family

and am so glad we made an impromptu stop to visit them for a couple of hours.
i've known them since i was FOUR.

i love
that we stayed with jimily for a few days.

i did not love
that it was only a few days.

i love
that i met this hot blogger


i did not love
posing for a picture with two gorgeous actresses.
can you say, dork?

i loved
seeing jana for the first time in a long, long time
and getting to chat it up.


i love
this picture

and a hilarious series of others where we didn't know
why paul kept telling us "one more."

i do not love
that this is the extent of the pictures we took together.

i love
how this picture looks like i'm on a blue screen.
so wierd.

{ya..i don't know why i'm holding mabel up like this.}

i love
that we went to temple square

but did not love
that we didn't stay very long.
{The Family: A Proclamation exhibit was amazing, though.}

i love
that we went to the oquirrh mountain temple open house
with brook and tamie
and that the kids knew what was happening,
loved it
and were well behaved.
{at least until we tried to take pictures}


i love
how fancy the refreshment tent was.

i loved
seeing chalyce and meeting her little boy.


i love
that i met this blogger
who i've "known" for a couple of years.
i loved her so much and her two darling children.


i DON'T LOVE
that meggity couldn't come to the bbq

i did not love
getting lost on our way to paul's brother's house in eagle mountain.
in the dark.
{thank goodness after repeating myself five times
paul FINALLY called his brother for directions.}

i love
that i'm married to the fun uncle


i do not love
that my camera was on the wrong setting.
cuz otherwise this picture would have been so cute.


i love
that we were RIGHT THERE for the fireworks
watching them being set off.

i love
that paul had all his brothers and brothers in law and his dad
and my dad and brook
standing in the circle with him for mabel's blessing.


i did not love
that my mom and grandparents
and two other siblings couldn't be there.

i love
that taylor brought little blue down for us.

i loved
the fresh halibut and shrimp
that david and michelle caught and brought straight from alaska
and served for an amazing dinner on sunday night.

i loved
staying up till 2am
talking with paul's brother and his wife.

i did not love
that my little max was starting to get sick
{this is him asleep. in the middle of the day.}


i did not love
snoasis not opening till 11am. the nerve.


i do not love
the anxiety i felt upon seeing these and similar signs.


i loved
that we rented a jetski for a few hours.

i do not love
that i didn't get a supercool bond-girl picture like michelle did here.


i love
paul's family


i do not love
that i didn't once lay in the hammock.


i love
this picture {and a dozen others} michelle took of mabel


i did not love
that max got very sick for the last few days of vacation
and missed an awesome family reunion.

and that i was worried about him the whole time.

i loved
playing scum and phase 1o twist with everyone.

i do not love
that i didn't see my sweet megan
before we had to leave.

i love
the very random playlist
that kept me company for the long 16 hour drive alone.
{we were caravaning little blue and the minivan}

i do not love
diet a&w rootbeer being the ONLY root beer
they served at the a&w in somewhere, idaho. sick.
especially since we stopped specifically for a&w root beer floats.

i love
the way the long drive gave me time to think
and sort out my life.


i love
that my plants didn't die
since i forgot to water them before we left.

i love
that my mailman stopped my mail for me.
since i forgot that too.

i love
being home. if only for one more week.

pretty bows

my current favorite lyrics..

rolled around
on kitchen floors.
tied my tongue
in pretty bows
with yours.
and now we pass
and just like glass
i see through you,
you see through me
like i'm not there.
you could make
my head swerve.
used to know
my every curve.
and now we meet
on a street,
and i am blind.
i cannot find
the heart
i gave to you.

~ingrid michaelson glass

brother

thanks for all the kindness people.
i still feel a little panicked about the huge tv.
it comes and goes.
like nausea.
julie understands.
because she went out, after hearing about our deal, and bought the same tv.

do you want a little update?
my awesome little brother came to visit last weekend.
he was only here for a couple of days but we had a blast eating a lot of food, catching up and playing games. he forced me to sit down and really listen to vampire weekend, which i now love. and i forced him to sit down and listen to the raconteurs, which he now loves. unfortunately, i don't so much anymore after he discovered that jack white is lead on the vocals. i have an aversion to the white stripes. i don't know why.


we went to see some local bands. he loved this crazy dude. i don't recommend watching the video, unless you want to be permanently scarred.



i really liked these guys, especially the girl guitarist:



and then we all thought these guys had the most potential of them all:



anyway. it took till about noon on sunday for our hearing to return.
i'm getting O.L.D.

i met my brother's awesome "girlfriend." she was sweet and smart and great with the kids. and she had this bag that looked like a face.


too bad i was too late to turn it in for omar's photo assignment.

and then! she had this crazy idea that she wanted me to color her hair. something i have never done before. i've done it on myself, but never on anyone else. how hard could it be? well, apparently i am highly incompetent. just FYI. don't ask me to color your hair. ever. well, maybe now you can cuz i know what NOT to do. she is now walking around her college campus with a lot of pretty black hair in front and huge chunks of brown in the back where it the dye didn't quite saturate. lame. sorry, taylor's "girlfriend".

screwing up his girlfriend's hair aside, i had a really nice time with my little brother. i'm trying to get him to move here after he graduates so we can hang out all the time. get a job at one of the huge companies here. google being the best option, of course.

celebrate

celebrate we will
because life is short
but sweet for certain.

tomorrow is a
huge
cause for celebration in the life of paul and myself.
tomorrow
we officially pay off
the debt we have been
slowly
chipping away at for
6 long years.
it's gone!
tomorrow!
gone!

in my head

this song is awesome.
i love it so much.
and can't get it out of my head.
it's razorlight.
though, i'm not really into their other songs.
only this one.

i'm trying to

relax.
and take it easy.

why are the holidays so darn stressful?

falling slowly

when paul and i were first married we lived in littleton, colorado. paul was finishing up his degree at the university of colorado campus in denver and i worked at the downtown hyatt as an admin helping with the events and weddings and parties. we lived within walking distance to the light rail station so we would take it on a daily basis. we loved it. but we almost always were riding it at different times.

one night on my ride home from work, i looked up from the book i was reading and saw a reflection of a guy standing by the stairs and briefly thought how good looking he was. then i did a double take and it was paul. i was unsure if i should tell him my thoughts, but i eventually did. luckily he was flattered and not bothered by the fact.

i don't know you
but I want you
all the more for that
words fall through me
and always fool me
and I can't react
and games that never amount
to more than they're meant
will play themselves out

take this sinking boat
and point it home
we've still got time
raise your hopeful voice
you have a choice
you've made it now

falling slowly,
eyes that know me
and I can't go back
moods that take me
and erase me
and I'm painted black
you have suffered enough
and warred with yourself
it's time that you won

take this sinking boat
and point it home
we've still got time
raise your hopeful voice
you had a choice
you've made it now

take this sinking boat
and point it home
we've still got time
raise your hopeful voice
you had a choice
you've made it now
falling slowly
sing your melody
i'll sing along

starry eyed surprise

and then, because writing that post made me think of this song..
a little paul oakenfold for you.
cold war kids will just have to wait till next time.
push to play, i took it off of autostart.

music

i am loving this jens lekman video.
i love his monotone voice and the upbeat tempo of the trumpets
and him clapping along.

maria taylor

i am loving maria taylor right now.
i heard about her on npr a couple of weeks ago and have been listening to her 11:11 album.

her voice reminds me of
rain and leaves falling.
and comfortable silences.
big, warm sweaters.
and staying in bed till late morning.
the idea of reading poetry.
laying on my back in the grass.
love even though life is hard.
joy through the pain.
sunshine in the clouds.

you'll just do it all again

do you remember back when i discovered regina spektor? she single handedly revived my love of music. helped me refocus on that glorious feeling that good music and well thought out lyrics give me. well, i hadn't listened to her in a while. and i did today. alone, in the car. without my kids. which, if you don't have kids, you might not understand how nice this is sometimes. and these are still my favorite lyrics. listen closely:

this is how it works
you peer inside yourself
you take the things you like
and try to love the things you took
and then you take that love you made
and stick it into some
someone else's heart
pumping someone else's blood
and walking arm in arm
you hope it don't get harmed
but even if it does
you'll just do it all again

music

i love music. i love unique sounds and unconventional instruments and most especially, lyrics. i envy the days in high school and college when i would just lay on my bed and let my music wash over me and get inside of me and help to create a part of who i was. i love to discover new artists and revisit old, timeless artists.

currently, though? let me give you a current picture of the sad, non-musical corner in the midst of my busy life. there are only three times during the day that i listen to anything:

1. in the morning, getting ready i listen to npr.
2. driving in my car with/without kids i listen to npr, the local dance music station or a new cd i've picked up at the library.
3. getting ready to go on a date/ladies night i listen to the local dance music station.

how exciting is that?

but occasionally, out of the blue and more rarely than i would like, i have a rebirth of music. when i hear a song on the radio or a cd that i've picked up and chills run through me. a song touches me to the core and makes me stop and listen more carefully and maybe even makes me cry. isn't that what music is all about? to say things that normal, everyday words can't?

the whole reason for this post is that i had that musical rebirth. i discovered regina spektor. and maybe all of you have already heard of her and she's old news. but i could care less. especially the song samson. i feel liberated. i feel like my whole life is lit up. this is what good music does to me. it makes me feel like i'm new again.

look at me

a while back i bought ava a plain tshirt in the hopes that i would eventually have a brilliant idea for a cool saying to iron on it. months later after trying and failing at paul's birthday tshirt, i think i finally got it right. i love iron ons! woo-hoo! so here is the one i did for ava. i don't think she's too fond of it. it's doesn't even come close to being as cool as her princess shirt that she wants to wear day and night. but i think it turned out fine and i like it because it's the title of one of my favorite kids songs by duplex. just turn your head sideways to look at it and enjoy this little bit of my creativity.

don't sing to me

while listening to my new 400 disc changer today, a song came on that made me cringe. after all these years i am still embarassed for the guy who sang u2's "with or without you" over the phone to me. argh. only a few guys have sang to me in my lifetime and i have to say, it's just better if your kidding. like paul singing "stick shifts and safety belts" complete with hugging and kissing. that is sweet. i know there are girls out there who actually like it when a guy is emotional and vulnerable, but...i don't know. i'm just not one of them. for a while there i thought that being with paul made me less emotional, but i come to realized that i was embarassed about emotion long before paul came into my life. emotion is not pretty. someone pining over you, loving you adoringly, crying in a blubbery way, it's just not attractive. but emotion in a passionate, angry way is, on the other hand, attractive for some reason. jealousy for example. manly egotism. it's how men are supposed to be. sing killers song, "mr. brightside" and that would be a different story.